Posts Tagged ‘Lisa Miskovsky’

Sweet Misery…

Posted: January 24, 2012 by Roberts in Running Log
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Heading home from work on Friday night, I debated my return to running. The debate centered not around if I would, but if I could. Stiffness had made itself at home in my ankle all week. If there was a tear in the ligament, rushing back into running could bench me for even longer, or end it completely. This was an addiction I could not afford to sacrifice to impatience. How could I give up this drug, this vice, that is running? How enjoyable could my run really be if each step would bring worry and doubt? Each step pounding into the pavement was a potential roll of the dice to ruin. Yet each step was also a step closer to satisfaction.

While I mulled over this conundrum, the music shuffle switched songs to Sweet Misery by Lisa Misckovsky. A simple song, and yet it spoke volumes to me of what it means to want something that could hurt you; to want something that brings you pain, suffering and joy.

You are my sweet little,
Sweet little misery
You are my sweet little
Sweet little misery
Now the words on the street
They say we’re history
You are my sweet little,
Cheap little misery

Running is my sweet misery. I ask myself why I go back to it, and all I know is that I have to. I was dreading and looking forward to the next morning’s run at the same time.

On Saturday I woke with a plan for my triumphant return to running. The ankle, though stiff, was ready. The route, planned. The soul, wanting. I opened the blinds, and was greeted by the first snowfall of the season. Figures.

My snowy return to running

Fates, why do you toy with me so? Now, I am not one to shy away from a nice winter run, but in this case, danger was afoot. Scanning the neighborhood, I could tell my neighbors had not shoveled their driveways and sidewalks. I doubted they intended to have them cleared any time soon. A recovering ankle and icy streets sounded like a recipe for disaster. The wear and tear of a normal run is one thing to risk, black ice is another.

So if I couldn’t run outside, that meant…..the DREADMILL! Not since my first summer of running had I used it. I was passed that chapter of my running career. It had allowed me to control my pace, and get used to the idea of running. It had also allowed me to run at a very slow pace and not embarrass myself on the street. Running outdoors was so much more liberating. The outdoors and fresh air motived me. The basement walls and concrete floor of the basement represented everything that was not running to me. Running is freedom. Running is adventure. Running is the peaceful solitude of nature and my thoughts. The basement is a cave, a dungeon. I want my freedom! But today, it was not to be. If I wanted to run, it was the treadmill or nothing. I swallowed my pride and accepted that today was to be an indoor running day. Oh treadmill, shall we dance?

I did not want to stress the ankle too much, and as I said earlier, it was still stiff. I took the run slowly. I put in a solid 3.5 miles. It felt good – the run that is, not the ankle. It was not quite as satisfying as an outdoor run would have been, but it felt great just to move. During the run, my body reminded me that I am not 100%. I had gotten soft in these past six weeks, and my ankle would not let me forget it. My heart pounded in my chest a little too hard, and a mild cramp appeared and then disappeared.

Goal One: Get back to my pre-holiday fitness level
Goal Two: Surpass it

The lesson I learned from this was that the treadmill is a useful tool, not just a starting point. Over the next couple runs (until the ice melts) it will allow me to get back in step. I plan to incorporate it into my next 28 weeks of training for interval and incline work.

From that single run I feel mentally better. I can only relate it to the time I tried to give up coffee for a month. After a long hiatus and that first cup of java, I felt serenity wash over me. It, as did this run, gave me back something I had been missing. It is good to be back or, at least heading back.

Next Run: 3 Miles (Tuesday)
Next Race: Kelly St. Patrick’s Day Shamrock 5K

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Distance: 2.07 Miles
Pace: 9’00”

Ok, that was the final short run before I run the half marathon distance tomorrow.  I am excited and worried at the same time.  It has been over two weeks since I have run over ten miles.  This last run was fantastic.  It was short, but I knew that going in to it.  I pushed myself and didn’t let up until my my legs told me to let off.  I set a new PR for the first mile, and for the entire run distance.  I almost got it under a 9 miute pace.  Yeah, I know for a pro that is nothing, for me, it is fantastic.  I hope to make that seem like nothing one day.

This was the first run I have done listening to music, rather than a podcast, in quite some time.  It is funny what came up on shuffle:

Iron – Iron Kid (Song from Assassin’s Creed Revelation Trailer)
Still Alive – Lisa Miskovsky (Song from Mirror’s Edge Trailer)
The Bomb – Bitter:Sweet (Starts off telling you to be all you can be)
Faster – Janelle Monae (A song that continues to pick up pace telling you to go faster.)

Each song seemed to try to push me harder and harder.  On a short run I can see that working; on a two hour run it may be exhausting or boring.  I am not quite sure which.

So I have decided to include P90X workouts into my routine. I watched the introductory video today, and if it is even half as tough as they make it out to be, this may kick my ass.  Then again, I thought running more than a couple minutes was impressive.  My primary focus of trianing will still be the running.  I am not planning on giving up on my goals.  At the same time I want to improve my overall health, and I believe some strength training will help.  After I complete tomorrow’s run I will lay out the next 12 weeks with runs and the P90X exercises.  Once those 12 weeks are done, I will map out the next 12 and complete out the last of the P90X routines.  Should I call it P180X or P45X?  Either way, I will be working out six days a week.  My only worry is with my work schedule, am I taking on too much?  I will revaluate on week 3, by then I am a quarter of the way in and have a good sense if I can keep it up.

I heard and expression the other day on an appointment, “It is easier to create than it is to maintain.”  It is so true in life and in business.  And the scary thing is, it is also true with weight loss and a workout routine.  This week has proven it to me.  This past week has been three ever decreasing runs, and my weigh in most likely will not be down.  It would be very easy to shelf this whole endevour and fall back into my old ways.  It is easy not to maintain this progress and return to being fat on the couch.  Glory may not always be found along the hard road; it is never found on the easy one.

Next Run: 13.1 Miles
Next Race: Burlington Race for the Hungry 5K